The Emancipation Proclamation

After the resounding success of Union forces at the Battle of Antietam, Lincoln has announced his preliminary Emancipation Proclamation, freeing all slaves in states currently in rebellion against the Union. Mission Accomplished!

Matthew Brady Studio presents "The Dead Of Antietam"

For Immediate Release:

Matthew Brady studio, home of world renowned photographer and portrait artist Matthew Brady, proudly presents a new series of images: THE DEAD OF ANTIETAM

These images, taken just days after this most glorious battle, depict the men of both sides upon the great battlefield. Mr. Brady, along with his assistants Alexander Gardner and Timothy O'Sullivan, have captured a unique view of war never seen by civilian eyes. No painting can ever do justice to battle, now that Mr. Brady has turned his famous lens upon these glorious scenes.

This exhibition has been hailed by The Times thusly:
"Mr. Brady has done something to bring home to us the terrible reality and earnestness of war. If he has not brought bodies and laid them in our dooryards and along streets, he has done something very like it."

Included in this press release are three images from Mr. Brady's exhibition, please consider using them in your publication.

Please address all inquiries to Matthew Brady Studio, New York NY

The Battle of Antietam

	Good morning!
	I've got you right where I want you, backed up against the river.
	I got to tell you I've been waiting for this
	Why don't you just surrender and save us all alot of trouble?
	Hmmmm after winning every battle up to this point...SIR I THINK NOT
	Well then you're asking for it
	Don't even bring that up it's so ridiculous.
	LOL
	Hooker is coming thru the Cornfield as we speak
	ROTFL
	We go them in our sights actually
	That's a whole Union Corps
	You're fucked!
	We've been setting up positions all night
	It is you that are fucked
	hmmm, it looks like your puny little cannons can't fire across the creek where I have all my big gunz
	lolz
	I can haz artillery support?
	You should try the sunken road
	Right, I'm going to try the Sunken Rd
	not when I've got all my guys pushing into the East and WEst woodz
	I'm just saying
	we don't have many guys there
	thanx for the 411
	It's pretty defenseless
	I forgot about it
	looks like Mansfield's Corps is about to go into the Cornfield too
	i just wish Burnside would get moving on that Bridge to the south
	maybe you're right about that sunken road
	i'll send some guys to have a look
	Oh shoot, I forgot to put troops there as well
	you are a pretty shitty general
	I know, it's terrible
	You on the other hand have been applauded by Lincoln
	haven't you?
	I tolerate Lincoln for now
	that great ape
	the feared, great leader that you are
	HA
	my mom says a I'm a great general!
	hey look we've almost taken that sunken road from you
	just a few more brigades and it's ours!
	hmmmm it appears you ahve broken some of my lines near the cornfield
	TO THE DUNKER CHURCH!!!!1!
	I'll have to divert a few forces, but that's nothing tragic
	We'll hold the line while you make up your mind
	You'll never make it to the Church
	Oh jeez
	I just got a text that says Genl Mansfield was kill and Hooker shot in the foot
	Did I mention we completely outnumber you
	you'd better not commit your entire force
	i know, but I will save my army and the Union cauze to fite another day
	Who the f*** sent that old fool Sumner into the fight?
	He's like my grandpa, with his pants pulled up around his nipples and always wanting to give me hard candy
	he gets lost on his way to the bathroom
	My fierce Texans without breakfast I might add are making short work of your advance on the church
	If someone could shoot Old Man Sumner you'd be doing me a favor
	Nice work interrupting them before they could eat
	There's nothing like a hungry texan
	it's okay, I've got the Sunken Road now so they can eat hot lead
	I told them they'd be having union forces for breakfast
	FINALLY!!!!
	That idiot Burnside is moving on the lower bridge
	We got Gordon at the road
	I will say, tho, the man has great taste in facial hair
	Gordon!!! LOLZ
	against the whole 9th Corps?????!
	srsly?
	I got to say you have some balls trying to take higher ground from across the bridge
	hyooooog ballz
	i don't even need the bridge, once i find Snavely's Ford downriver
	again it looks like 5 union troops are held off by one rebel
	that's a pretty good ratio I reckon
	Christ just give up the bridge already
	no, the bridge is a far better crossing point
	douche
	AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHAAAHHAAAA!!!!!
	CHHHHHAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGEE!!!!
	I promised my boys whiskey if they took the bridge and guess what!?!
	where are you going boys? You want to be shot in the back?
	all mine!!
	dammit
	!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
	I'll shoot your boys in the back
	cowards
	argghh and it seems you have reinforcements coming up from Harper's Ferry
	that's pretty god thinking
	finally
	oh wait....it's my boys in your uniforms
	HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
	All I need to do is capture the town and
	fuck
	fuck
	fuck
	is that AP Hilll?
	DH Hill?
	I'm not sure though, maybe they are yours....wait until they can get close enough
	allt hose damn hills look the same
	Oh yea, they are mine.
	Good thinking to use the union jackets
	I want to talk to that man personally
	Where is the rest of your army? I thought you had like a million guys here?
	genius
	i better watch out for a flank attack to the north
	you are a traitor and a rebel and a bastard fuck you fuck you
	I must save the Union
	Well you've lost the bridge again
	nice work boys!
	extra breakfasts alla round
	well, it looks like the sun is setting
	we'll kick your azz in the morning
	Seriously though, there's going to be a lot of widows and fatherless children to take up arms against you for generations
	and just as many to fight against your traitorous rebellion
	I can't be bothered with this bullshit IM anymore....why don't you go twitter about it to someone who cares
	I have wounded to attend to
	booo hooo go cry to mommy on your blog
	we took over your house, btw
	using it as a cemetery now
	so what do you say....IM again in the morning?
	IT WASN'T MY HOUSE
	see you then!
	jackass
	lolz